I hereby decree

by David LeMieux


Rootbeer Milk

When I was in grade school I got school lunch (hot lunch, as it were). After I picked up my meal I would alway head over to the milk fridges and pick up some chocolate milk. Every once in a while, though, instead of chocolate milk there was rootbeer milk. Yes, rootbeer flavored milk. It was weird and not extremely enjoyable. Unfortunately the packaging was enough like the chocolate milk that I never realized until I got to my table what I had done.

Years later I was telling this story to my wife and some other friends and they all looked at me like I was crazy. Rootbeer milk? Such a thing must surely be a figment of my imagination. Since it happened so long ago and only every once and while and not on a regular schedule I began to doubt my memories. Had I really had rootbeer milk? Did it exist?

Recently a new dairy store opened up here in Rexburg. They have delicious ice cream that is also very cheap. They also sell milk and cheese. The other day we were there to get some ice cream (we walked, it is like five block from our house) and while I was looking through their milk fridge I saw it. Rootbeer milk. I immediately had to try some/buy it. So I did. Still has that same not-quite-good taste from my childhood. My memories were confirmed. I really did have rootbeer milk in elementary school. I now have another arrow in my quiver of times-I-was-right-and-no-one-else-believed-me-so-that-makes-me-more-trustworthy.

Rootbeer milk still tastes funny. Try it once, but don't expect to fall in love.


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